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-   -   Need some parenting help..... (http://www.saltycajun.com/forum/showthread.php?t=22181)

1fastmerc 08-16-2011 10:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PaulMyers (Post 307837)
That works, the reds should be here any day.

EVO

Where where where. Haha we still need to go fishing.


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PaulMyers 08-16-2011 10:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 1fastmerc (Post 307845)
Where where where. Haha we still need to go fishing.


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You work all the time and I never work. We can't seem to get on the same schedule. ;) the barrier should be really heating up any day now.

EVO

PUREBAY2200 08-16-2011 10:41 PM

My mom was the one who brought the topic up to me..... 8th grade. Some of the kids got caught doing stuff at a party.....parents talked to eachother and lots of parents were pissed!lol
Anyway, I respected my mom alot for her talk. I knew that she was trying to explain the facts bc she wanted me to b informed and prepared.
I guess that between my mom talking to me & my southern baptist upbringing i put alot of emphasis on holding onto my virginity until i was totally ready for the responsibility & actions.I decided in 10th grade that I was gonna wait till I felt comfortable with sex and was with the right girl b4 I had sex..... Took a while. Lol
Not trying to sound cool but I passed alot in college.... Just wasnt ready..... I learned other ways to please the ladies. Lol
But when I made the jump and gave it away I was old enough and mature enough to accept responsibility. I dont regret waiting one bit!! One of my best decisions ever!!

"W" 08-16-2011 11:08 PM

Give him like some words of the day

Boner
Taco
One eyed Willie
Making bacon

BIRD DOG 08-17-2011 12:42 AM

Im not sure if Id let him know you went through his phone. He might loose his trust for you.It definatly needs to be talked about though.Personally I think you should wait for marriage.I didnt and had two girls at age 19 with a girl I cant stand!! I got full custody of my two girls when they were 2 and 3 and still have them today!Most guys at that age would run and not accept the responsibility of their actions.Children born out of wedlock usually have a pretty rough life.One parents usually not around and nothing can heal that pain.Im sure since he is your stepson he can relate to broken homes so maybe that will help.Talk to him about how a girl should be respected and that girls that sleep around are not.Good luck with this one,there was good and bad advice on the thread so I hope it works out for ya!

jaclyn.renea 08-17-2011 08:18 AM

Not the best advice but kids are gonna be kids no matter how much you " talk" to them. Just need to have a sit down about protection and let life and hormones take it from there. You can't punish him or he will rebel even more! Be honest with him. That is the best you can really do.

evidrine 08-17-2011 09:05 AM

A lot of the advise here seems to be something I would expect you do with a 15 or 16 year old. Im not sure what I would do about my 13 year old. Thats really young. Tough one.

jpeff31787 08-17-2011 09:33 AM

my dad never talked to me about it, but my mom would always say "no hanky panky" and it seemed to work

BassAssasin 08-17-2011 09:34 AM

Man this scares me, my little girl is 3 so that means i only got 8 more years. God better make me a different man before that time comes or i may wind up in jail for beating a little kid

jpeff31787 08-17-2011 12:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BassAssasin (Post 307940)
Man this scares me, my little girl is 3 so that means i only got 8 more years. God better make me a different man before that time comes or i may wind up in jail for beating a little kid


for real man... i don't know what i'd do if would find out this kind of stuff about my kid. I don't have one but phew.... May be bad. Kid might not see any light for a few months.

Dink I don't know how to get your kid to stop, but I wish you the best of luck and if you do figure anything out. Please share!

I was always given tough love, so I'd probably give that back. Tell your kid if he wants to start having sex, your going to have to grow up get a job, pay for your own schooling, groceries and everything else. Then somehow scare him to believe that if he does it again the chances of him having a kid will improve each time and that a condom is a 50/50 chance of not getting a kid pregnant. Also someone brought up the threat of having the females dad kick his little butt which I thought was good advice. Like I said no one really had any talk with me and I think I was a pretty darn good kid. Mom and Dad just always made it clear that I better not embarass them in any way or they'd embarass me more.

SULPHITE 08-17-2011 01:02 PM

Quote:

I better not embarass them in any way or they'd embarass me more.
BAM! Thats the ticket right there. I was threatend with my life (to an extent) to be respectful and polite...otherwise I'd get my azz handed to me. I knew no other way!

1fastmerc 08-17-2011 01:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PaulMyers (Post 307850)
You work all the time and I never work. We can't seem to get on the same schedule. ;) the barrier should be really heating up any day now.

EVO

We need to trade jobs. Lol


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Lake Chuck Duck 08-17-2011 01:16 PM

Luckily I wasnt very good at "spittin game" when I was a kid so its hard to get a girl pregnant when the opportunity to doesnt even exist lol. As far as advice goes Dink, I say take him up to Petes, yall take a seat at the bar and get some abita root beers, and just have a good ol fashion heart to heart. Real casual non aggressive conversation. Maybe give him some "when I was your age....." examples (maybe stretch the truth a little). And if he doesnt take the hint there is always scare tactics: "if you get a girl pregnant, you gotta quit school and get a job, then you gotta find a place to live because there wont be any baby raisin goin on here!". No just kiddin, dont let him know you went through his phone thats for sure.

SaltERedneck 08-17-2011 01:21 PM

gooooogle an image of an STD and that will scare the bejesus outta him. a lot of good ideas here dink... let us know how it goes. prayin for ya!

Dink 08-17-2011 01:49 PM

Thanks guys.....and girl. Checked it again today. I must say, the boys got game!!!!

What worries me the most is that he reminds me of me........I'm gonna try to be the "big brother" that he doesn't have.....the fine line between dad and friend is to fine for me to see, so I came up with the brother thing.....

What y'all think of having a few of his friends there too?? They are like a second family to me since they're always around......it may lighten the mood a little and get them talking. Then after I can pull him aside and talk in private???

fishinpox 08-17-2011 01:55 PM

I wouldn't talk to the other kids it's not your responsibility and may be over stepping boundries

Lake Chuck Duck 08-17-2011 02:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dink (Post 308048)
Thanks guys.....and girl. Checked it again today. I must say, the boys got game!!!!

What worries me the most is that he reminds me of me........I'm gonna try to be the "big brother" that he doesn't have.....the fine line between dad and friend is to fine for me to see, so I came up with the brother thing.....

What y'all think of having a few of his friends there too?? They are like a second family to me since they're always around......it may lighten the mood a little and get them talking. Then after I can pull him aside and talk in private???

I think you should lighten your mood with a few drinks before you start this, I know I would have to lol.

jpeff31787 08-17-2011 02:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lake Chuck Duck (Post 308032)
Luckily I wasnt very good at "spittin game" when I was a kid so its hard to get a girl pregnant when the opportunity to doesnt even exist lol. As far as advice goes Dink, I say take him up to Petes, yall take a seat at the bar and get some abita root beers, and just have a good ol fashion heart to heart. Real casual non aggressive conversation. Maybe give him some "when I was your age....." examples (maybe stretch the truth a little). And if he doesnt take the hint there is always scare tactics: "if you get a girl pregnant, you gotta quit school and get a job, then you gotta find a place to live because there wont be any baby raisin goin on here!". No just kiddin, dont let him know you went through his phone thats for sure.


AWESOME POINT!! I don't think anyone has mentioned that yet. Good job. I know I would HATE it if my parents would of done that!

jpeff31787 08-17-2011 02:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dink (Post 308048)
Thanks guys.....and girl. Checked it again today. I must say, the boys got game!!!!

What worries me the most is that he reminds me of me........I'm gonna try to be the "big brother" that he doesn't have.....the fine line between dad and friend is to fine for me to see, so I came up with the brother thing.....

What y'all think of having a few of his friends there too?? They are like a second family to me since they're always around......it may lighten the mood a little and get them talking. Then after I can pull him aside and talk in private???


i see your good intentions with having the friends around, but in this case I'd say no friends man. I'm just trying to think on how i would of liked my dad to do this and I think I'd rather it just me and him. I think may dad would of said something "look man I've been hearing some rumors of you and some girls and I don't like what I'm hearing and I'm going to ask you to stop before you get yourself into some trouble."

Or something along those lines.. nonaggressive yet assertive in a way. Just do your thing bro, I hope it goes well Tim! I know its gotta suck and the ugly thing is it'll probably suck even more by the time i have a kid and he/she is 13...

southern151 08-17-2011 02:33 PM

Every situation is unique. You know him better than he knows himself, most likely. Make the call on how ya handle it. I'm sure you'll do fine with it. We all enjoy your joking ways but, I am certain that you can be serious when needed and, I'm sure you have been and will continue to be a positive roll model in his life.


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