View Single Post
  #16  
Old 09-07-2010, 07:37 PM
simplepeddler's Avatar
simplepeddler simplepeddler is offline
Ling
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: saint amant
Posts: 3,421
Cash: 1,684
Default

It's hard enough to raise your own son, much less another man's.

But if God himself believed Joseph could raise His son then there is hope for us.

My bonus son came to me at 11.....he is going to be 21 in November, Still chooses to live here.

Yes, it was and is still a challenge. I can assure you, and hear my loud and clear, you will NEVER convince him his dad is "wrong" of Bad. Not saying you are trying, just wanted to get that out.

And frankly, you will get all kind of advice from men that do not have bonus children on "how any kid under my roof......blah blah blah....." I actually was that way too.

Here is the deal, that boy has been given a second chance on learning what a real man is.

that chance is you

"I make oil" is dead on marathon...small bites of a big elephant.

what you want to do now, is not screw up ANY chance of having a relationship with him when he is becoming a man.

when he gets in trouble, be the first one there.
when he needs a talking to, do it with compassion, but fortitude
when you screw up (and you will) apologize to him

find something his dad would agree with you on, but maybe not the way you would like, and work together.

My "husband in-law" as I call him now, and I bought our son his first shotgun together, since dad had no present, I let him give it to him on Christmas day.

When they needed a larger vehicle for him and his dad and girlfriend and kids to Disney,
I handed "husband in-law" the keys to our two day old Yukon.

It's a *****, but take the high road. Do not let HIS dad disrespect YOUR wife.

He will likely find a common ground.

Mine and I are still a work in progress, and I bite my tongue ...alot......

Check out a good book and quick read "God breaths on blended families"
well worth the time
Reply With Quote