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The Comedy Club (Jokes, Humor) Tell your favorite jokes here! Keep it PG rated, please.

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  #1  
Old 08-17-2010, 11:16 AM
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Default Classes for Women



SummerClasses for Women at
THE ADULT LEARNING CENTER


REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED
By Sat.,
August 21, 2010

NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL
OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM
.

Class 1

Up in Winter, Down in Summer - How to Adjust aThermostat
Step by Step, with Slide Presentation.

Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hrs beginning at 7:00 PM..


Class 2

Which Takes More Energy - Putting the Toilet Seat Down, or *****ing About It for 3 Hours?
Round Table Discussion.

Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.


Class 3

Is It Possible To Drive Past a Wal-Mart Without Stopping?--Group Debate.

Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.


Class 4

Fundamental Differences Between a Purse and a Suitcase--Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.

Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.


Class 5

Curling Irons--Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Bathroom Cabinet?
Examples on Video.

Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning
At 7:00 PM


Class 6

How to Ask Questions During Commercials and Be Quiet During the Program
Help Line Support and Support Groups.

Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM


Class 7

Can a Bath Be Taken Without 14 Different Kinds of Soaps and Shampoos?
Open Forum
.
Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.


Class 8

Health Watch--They Make Medicine for PMS - USE IT!

Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.


Class 9

I Was Wrong and He Was Right!--Real Life Testimonials.

Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined.


Class 10

How to Parallel Park In Less Than 20 Minutes Without an Insurance Claim.
Driving Simulations.

4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours.


Class 11

Learning to Live--How to Apply Brakes Without Throwing Passengers Through the Windshield
.
Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined


Class 12

How to Shop by Yourself.

Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.


Upon completion of
ANYof the above courses, diplomas will be issued to the survivors.

[SIZE=3][/SIZE]
</SPAN>
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  #2  
Old 08-17-2010, 11:23 AM
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where do i sign her up at ??

***** !!
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  #3  
Old 08-17-2010, 11:38 AM
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I feel an EXCUSE ME!!! coming
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Old 08-17-2010, 11:44 AM
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I'm with him on that one!^^^^
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  #5  
Old 08-17-2010, 12:18 PM
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lmao
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  #6  
Old 08-17-2010, 12:19 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jordan View Post
where do i sign her up at ??

***** !!
home schooling man, gotta set it straight or you'll be trampled.
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  #7  
Old 08-17-2010, 12:43 PM
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classes start today !!
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Old 08-17-2010, 01:11 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jordan View Post
classes start today !!
I'll be sure to bring PLENTY of popcorn! This, although short lived, is sure to be a good show!
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  #9  
Old 08-17-2010, 01:32 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by southern151 View Post
I'll be sure to bring PLENTY of popcorn! This, although short lived, is sure to be a good show!
X2
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  #10  
Old 08-17-2010, 02:34 PM
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Jordan......wanna borrow my shovel?? Then you can dig your grave with both hands!!!!
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  #11  
Old 08-17-2010, 02:36 PM
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jordan the way its going your only "women" will be Suzie Palmer her five sisters and a bottle of jergens...

Last edited by SULPHITE; 08-17-2010 at 02:53 PM.
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  #12  
Old 08-17-2010, 02:49 PM
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the calluses add extra pressure.....
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  #13  
Old 08-17-2010, 02:57 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SULPHITE View Post
jordan the way its going your only "women" will be Suzie Palmer her five sisters and a bottle of jergens...
lmao he sure won't be the guy in your avatar
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  #14  
Old 08-17-2010, 03:01 PM
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# 10 is SO fitting here......wife was backing new Acadia the 2nd day we had it.......she backed into our big trashcan and busted the taillight lens........I asked her how she could have done this.....answer....."I was distracted by a loud beeping and some flashing lights on the ceiling of the car"

In other words, the backup sensors..........


I love my blond!!!!
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  #15  
Old 08-17-2010, 03:07 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dink View Post
# 10 is SO fitting here......wife was backing new Acadia the 2nd day we had it.......she backed into our big trashcan and busted the taillight lens........I asked her how she could have done this.....answer....."I was distracted by a loud beeping and some flashing lights on the ceiling of the car"

In other words, the backup sensors..........


I love my blond!!!!
LOL I wish you guys lived closer! Your wife with the trash cans and wagons and you with your carports posts! Man, I could retire in a year!
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  #16  
Old 08-17-2010, 03:08 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by southern151 View Post
LOL I wish you guys lived closer! Your wife with the trash cans and wagons and you with your carports posts! Man, I could retire in a year!
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  #17  
Old 08-17-2010, 09:20 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jordan View Post
where do i sign her up at ??

***** !!
Not nice, pookie. :[
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  #18  
Old 08-17-2010, 09:58 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by southern151 View Post
LOL I wish you guys lived closer! Your wife with the trash cans and wagons and you with your carports posts! Man, I could retire in a year!

Your quite the comedian! Minor mishaps, that's all........


Yeah, OK. There may be a pattern.......
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  #19  
Old 08-18-2010, 07:37 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dink View Post
Your quite the comedian! Minor mishaps, that's all........


Yeah, OK. There may be a pattern.......
The truth will set you free!

BTW, don't get mad at me! I still wanna fix your boat! I can also take care of the majority of that post incodent too when you get it here!
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  #20  
Old 08-18-2010, 07:44 PM
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Disclaimer: This post is for entertainment only and does not apply to me...except for the 14 different shampoos!
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