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-   -   Stupid things you've told your wife (http://www.saltycajun.com/forum/showthread.php?t=40336)

biggun 01-15-2013 07:05 PM

You all are some DUMB SOME *****ES... A friend of mine use to say stupid stuff like that until one night he came home a little tipsy, tried to get some Azz..

He passed out.. She then got out of bed, tied the bed sheets over him and commence to beat the S it out of him with a BROOM...

He nows yudders NOTHING BUT sweet nothings to her.. Plus she keeps the Broom next to the BED, so he can see it... HA HA HA HA ...

Remember guys "YOU CAN ATTRACT MORE FLYS WITH HONEY"..... And last but not least... "Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night".

Matt G 01-15-2013 07:15 PM

You right biggun, but I'm young enough that I can catch up for all the missed nights!! :cool:

biggun 01-15-2013 07:45 PM

LOL Matt... But I'm old ENOUGH to tell U... U can't catch up.. Everytime U miss the chance it's gone.. LOL... Mathmathically Spelling) Impossible.. LOL..

Wide Open 01-15-2013 07:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by southern151 (Post 538231)
Bout to head to the house for the evening. Gotta run back into the shop first and get my black electrical tape...Thanks to the a-hole that gave me the idea. I'll take pictures of what happened to me in the morning!

:D
After that try the vasaline on the toilet seat!:rolleyes:
That's another one I'll have to post when I get a minute!
You can use scotch tape also, it's clear and invisible to a woman's eyes! Lol

southern151 01-15-2013 07:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Wide Open (Post 538251)
:D
After that try the vasaline on the toilet seat!:rolleyes:
That's another one I'll have to post when I get a minute!
You can use scotch tape also, it's clear and invisible to a woman's eyes! Lol

Wife in pain...must abort mission...for today, that is! Repercussions could be life threatening if I tried to pull it off tonight!

southern151 01-15-2013 11:45 PM

Ya know what?! She feels good enough tonight to run her mouth...clear packing tape held it down perfect! That being said, my ins deductible is high so, can yall take up some $ to cover it?! I bet I'll need it but, she's got it coming!

Wide Open 01-16-2013 02:05 AM

Oh lawd!!! Lol

meaux fishing 01-16-2013 07:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by southern151 (Post 538321)
Ya know what?! She feels good enough tonight to run her mouth...clear packing tape held it down perfect! That being said, my ins deductible is high so, can yall take up some $ to cover it?! I bet I'll need it but, she's got it coming!

Lmao!!!

DUCKGOGETTER 01-16-2013 08:16 AM

This is gonna be good

Wide Open 01-16-2013 08:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by southern151 (Post 538321)
Ya know what?! She feels good enough tonight to run her mouth...clear packing tape held it down perfect! That being said, my ins deductible is high so, can yall take up some $ to cover it?! I bet I'll need it but, she's got it coming!

Don't forget it's on there and catch a bath urself!
Last time I did it, it was priceless! I was sitting 10 ft across at the bar, the woman walks up turns faucet on, and immidiately turns away and go's for the stove not realizing its pumping water all over the kitchen!
When she finally turned around we both were laughing soo hard we could cry!
I looked at her and said well, u got a mess on ur hands, turned and walked out!
It was crickets:!!!!
Until I retired with two chamois to clean it up! :-)

southern151 01-16-2013 08:39 AM

Well, I set the trap. She never went to the faucet before bed last night. Thank God she didn't get up in the middle of the night, while I was sleeping!! I figure my phone should be blowing up anytime now though...She's getting the kids ready for school!

Oh, this could be bad! I figure, by now, she knows why I was in such a hurry to get out of the house this morning. I left at 6:45! LOL!! Oh, what have I started?! Thanks a lot guys! UGH!

DUCKGOGETTER 01-16-2013 08:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by southern151 (Post 538349)
well, i set the trap. She never went to the faucet before bed last night. Thank god she didn't get up in the middle of the night, while i was sleeping!! I figure my phone should be blowing up anytime now though...she's getting the kids ready for school!

Oh, this could be bad! I figure, by now, she knows why i was in such a hurry to get out of the house this morning. I left at 6:45! Lol!! Oh, what have i started?! Thanks a lot guys! Ugh!


you better pick up a big thing of lotion on your way home today, cause sir you are officialy cut off

southern151 01-16-2013 08:52 AM

Well, I'm on the phone with her now. I've had an easier time understanding those import customer service reps than her right now! WOW!

1fastmerc 01-16-2013 08:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by southern151 (Post 538354)
Well, I'm on the phone with her now. I've had an easier time understanding those import customer service reps than her right now! WOW!

LMBO.


Sent from my stupid iPhone using Tapatalk

fun w son 01-16-2013 09:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by southern151 (Post 538354)
well, i'm on the phone with her now. I've had an easier time understanding those import customer service reps than her right now! Wow!

dead man talking!

DUCKGOGETTER 01-16-2013 09:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by southern151 (Post 538354)
well, i'm on the phone with her now. I've had an easier time understanding those import customer service reps than her right now! Wow!


lol!!!!!!!!! You're dead meat

Harley123 01-16-2013 08:16 PM

well we would like to know all the details and the a$$ chewing you got

southern151 01-16-2013 08:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Harley123 (Post 538622)
well we would like to know all the details and the a$$ chewing you got

Home now, and like a paranoid war veteran, I'm checking EVERY corner! This isn't over, I am sure. She plays a cool hand when she needs to. Too bad, I pick up on that!....maybe! Haha!

southern151 01-16-2013 08:30 PM

Just sprayed off my plate and, she grinned. She said, "I won't forget."

I'm screwed!

1fastmerc 01-16-2013 08:53 PM

Lol


Sent from my stupid iPhone using Tapatalk


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