Army letter home

[eman]

Dear Ma and Pa:
I am well. Hope you are. I sure miss yall. Tell Brother Walt and Brother Elmer that the Army beats working for old man Minch, by a mile. Tell them to join up quick before all the places are filled. I was restless at first because you got to stay in bed till nearly 6am, but I'm getting so I like to sleep late.
Tell Walt and Elmer all you do before breakfast is smooth your cot and shine some things. No hogs, to slop, feed to pitch, mash to mix, wood to split, fire to lay. Practically nothing. Men got to shave but it is not so bad, there's warm water.
Breakfast is strong on trimmings like fruit juice, cereal, eggs, bacon, etc., but kind of weak on chops, potatoes, ham, steak, fried eggplant, pie and other regular food. But tell Walt and Elmer you can always sit between two city boys that live on coffee. Their food plus yours holds you till noon, when you get fed again. It's no wonder these city boys can't walk much.
We go on "route marches," which the platoon sergeant says are long walks to harden us. If he thinks so, it is not my place to tell him different. A " route march" is about as far as to our mailbox at home. Then the city guys get sore feet and we all ride back in trucks. The country is nice but awful flat. The sergeant is like a school teacher. He nags some. The captain is like the school board. Majors and Colonels just ride around and frown. They don't bother you none.
This next part will kill Walt and Elmer with laughter. I keep getting medals for shooting. I don't know why. The bullseye is hear as big as A CHIPMUNK'S HEAD AND DON'T MOVE... and it ain't shooting back at you neither, like the Higgett boys at home..... All you got to do is lie there all comfortable and hit it. You don't even load your own cartridges. They come in boxes.
Then we have what they call hand-to-hand combat training. You get to wrestle with them city boys. I have to be real careful, though. They break real easy. It ain't like fighting with that old bull at home. I'm about the best they got in this except for that Tug Jordan from over in Broward County. He joined up the same time as me. But I'm only 5'6" and 130 pounds, and he's 6'8" and weighs near 300 pounds dry.
Be sure to tell Walt and Elmer to hurry and join before others get onto this setup and come stampeding in.

Your loving daughter,
Gail