Welcome to SaltyCajun.com!

Montauk17 · #1 01-12-2011, 10:34 AM

Over the past six months, your husband has caused
quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and
have been forced to ban both of you from the store..Our complaints
against your husband, Mr. Samuel, are listed below and are documented
by our video surveillance cameras.

1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put
them in other people's carts when they weren't looking.�

2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to
go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the
floor leading to the women's restroom.

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in
an official voice, 'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away. This
caused the employee to leave her assigned station and receive a
reprimand�� from her Supervisor that in turn resulted with a union
grievance, causing management to lose time and costing the company
money.

5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to
put a� bag of M&Ms on layaway.
6. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a
carpeted area.

7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department
and told the children shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring
pillows and blankets from the bedding department to which twenty
children obliged.

8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help
him he began crying and screamed, ' Why can't you people just leave me
alone?' EMTs were called.

9.. September 4: Looked right into the security camera
and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.

10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting
department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.

11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously
while loudly humming the 'Mission Impossible' theme.

12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced
his 'Madonna look' by using different sizes of funnels.

13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people
browsed through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'

14. October 21: When an announcement came over the
loud speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed� 'OH NO! IT'S
THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'

And last, but not least:

15. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the
door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet
paper in here.' One of the clerks passed out.