Stupid things you've told your wife

[DUCKGOGETTER]

This story isn't about me, but it's something i would sure tell my wife. We were at some freinds of ours house for dinner one night and we were sitting there after we ate and drinking and talking. My little girl had just started waliking and picked something up off their floor when his wife said what is she eating? He said it could be anything from rice, greenbeans or whatever else you didn't sweep up and his wife gets all on his ***. She starts yelling oh i know i'm a terrible wife, i don't cook, don't clean, i don't take care of the kids, i don't please you in bed. I know i'm just worthless, and he without thinking says "well atleast you still got your memory". I thought it was funny as hell and started laughing well she gets on both our asses. I still laugh when i think about it. Lol!!!!!!!!

[southern151]

Originally Posted by DUCKGOGETTER

This story isn't about me, but it's something i would sure tell my wife. We were at some freinds of ours house for dinner one night and we were sitting there after we ate and drinking and talking. My little girl had just started waliking and picked something up off their floor when his wife said what is she eating? He said it could be anything from rice, greenbeans or whatever else you didn't sweep up and his wife gets all on his ***. She starts yelling oh i know i'm a terrible wife, i don't cook, don't clean, i don't take care of the kids, i don't please you in bed. I know i'm just worthless, and he without thinking says "well atleast you still got your memory". I thought it was funny as hell and started laughing well she gets on both our asses. I still laugh when i think about it. Lol!!!!!!!!

Stored in memory!

[DUCKGOGETTER]

Originally Posted by southern151

stored in memory!

don't let me get you in trouble

[SaltERedneck]

Originally Posted by DUCKGOGETTER

so i guess you forgot about him leaving you for another woman. What kind of cousin love circle ya'll have going on?

Originally Posted by southern151

Seriously, go away! This is a funny thread, not "This week on Springer!"

Originally Posted by Lake Chuck Duck

For real only reason he is sayin all that is cuz he is trying to kiss her @$$ so she dont kick him out lmao

Originally Posted by DUCKGOGETTER

x2!!!!! They're relationship is so wacked out, and they air it out on a public forum then get mad when everyone jokes about their so called great realationship. Alot more i can say, but i'll keep it to myself.

great points fellas!!!! lol

[1fastmerc]

Originally Posted by DUCKGOGETTER

lol!!!!!!!!!! I would, but this would end up in the gillnet or a trip to ban camp for me so i'll just keep my lips sealed.

Lol!!!! Figured that.


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[BassAssasin]

3 weeks ago I told my wife that I would install our new laminate hardwood flooring....................................

[SaltERedneck]

Me: I think my mom is losing it.... she is completely outta control.. Its insanity.

Her: Well I see where you get it from! Looooooooong pause.... I guess i shouldnt have said that out loud.

story escalates... yada yada yada

Me: I dont know why my dad puts up with it.

Her: Yeah i almost emailed him and said "Why is it that the normal ones always get hooked up with the crazy ones?? "

Me: Explicative!! )(%$*%)*%$)(

[Matt G]

I figured this thread needed to be revived. Yesterday we were getting dressed to go take family pictures and the wife walked out of the bathroom and asked if she looked fat in this shirt.......... I said "With it on..... No. Without it..... Yep."

[bjhooper82]

Originally Posted by Matt G

I figured this thread needed to be revived. Yesterday we were getting dressed to go take family pictures and the wife walked out of the bathroom and asked if she looked fat in this shirt.......... I said "With it on..... No. Without it..... Yep."

That's not smart!! Sweet avatar btw

[Matt G]

Originally Posted by bjhooper82

That's not smart!! Sweet avatar btw

One of the photos from yesterday! Glamour Shot got classy baw!

[MarshRat89]

Originally Posted by Matt G

One of the photos from yesterday! Glamour Shot got classy baw!

Damn your hair grows fast! When I seen you Wednesday you were bald. Lol

[Matt G]

Originally Posted by MarshRat89

Damn your hair grows fast! When I seen you Wednesday you were bald. Lol

It's those pills I bought online to help other things grow. I think I got duped!

[Goooh]

Originally Posted by Matt G

I figured this thread needed to be revived. Yesterday we were getting dressed to go take family pictures and the wife walked out of the bathroom and asked if she looked fat in this shirt.......... I said "With it on..... No. Without it..... Yep."

Like

[Wide Open]

I walked in on mine blow drying her hair in her bra & panties, and said " hey skinny"!
(COLD HARD STARE)
I turned around and walked back out, I meant well :-)

[Matt G]

When all else fails, I bust out a fat joke! GEts her pissed everytime!!

[swamp snorkler]

Wife; What you want to do Fathers Day

Me; Chill out and watch the LSU game

Wife; What time does it come on

Me; Seven

Her; in the morning?

Me: Yes

Her: Really?

Me: Yes, they trying to beat the heat, it supposed to be 119 Degrees in Omaha this weekend.

Her: Well, at least they from Louisiana and the somewhat use to the heat.



She still thinks the game is comeine on at 7AM

[Smalls]

Originally Posted by swamp snorkler

Wife; What you want to do Fathers Day

Me; Chill out and watch the LSU game

Wife; What time does it come on

Me; Seven

Her; in the morning?

Me: Yes

Her: Really?

Me: Yes, they trying to beat the heat, it supposed to be 119 Degrees in Omaha this weekend.

Her: Well, at least they from Louisiana and the somewhat use to the heat.



She still thinks the game is comeine on at 7AM

Lmao, that's awesome. Worst thing I've said to my fiancée (and wife alittle less than 24 hours from now) was probably something to the effect of how clumsy she is and can't throw a ball straight. Yeah, I always get a fist to the shoulder for that one. Four and half years later, I still havent learned. Lmao.

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[Goooh]

Originally Posted by Smalls

Lmao, that's awesome. Worst thing I've said to my fiancée (and wife alittle less than 24 hours from now) was probably something to the effect of how clumsy she is and can't throw a ball straight. Yeah, I always get a fist to the shoulder for that one. Four and half years later, I still havent learned. Lmao.

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You better start punching her in the face right now, don't stand for her hitting you. You put a stop to that now before its too late.

I find that a thick phone book is best, you put it on side of her face and punch that. No bruises.

You're all welcome

[Bdub]

Originally Posted by Goooh

You better start punching her in the face right now, don't stand for her hitting you. You put a stop to that now before its too late.

I find that a thick phone book is best, you put it on side of her face and punch that. No bruises.

You're all welcome

rofl

[Smalls]

Originally Posted by Goooh

You better start punching her in the face right now, don't stand for her hitting you. You put a stop to that now before its too late.

I find that a thick phone book is best, you put it on side of her face and punch that. No bruises.

You're all welcome

Lmao, Nah, no need to get rough. She can't hit very hard either. Every once in a while she gets a good one on me, but I just give her a good ole slap on the rear end for payback.

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