SaltyCajun.com http://www.mkacpas.com/

Notices

Go Back   SaltyCajun.com > General Discussion Forums > The Comedy Club (Jokes, Humor)

The Comedy Club (Jokes, Humor) Tell your favorite jokes here! Keep it PG rated, please.

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 06-20-2013, 09:10 AM
CajunSaint's Avatar
CajunSaint CajunSaint is offline
Kyocera Dealer
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Lafayette
Posts: 2,616
Cash: 1,526
BigGrin Windows vs. Ford Motor Co.

At a computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the
computer industry with the auto industry and stated,

"If Ford had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we
would all be driving $25 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon."

In response to Bill's comments, Ford issued a press release stating:

If Ford had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be
driving cars with the following characteristics (and I just love this
part):

1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash.........twice a day.

2.. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to
buy a new car.

3... Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You
would have to pull to the side of the road, close all of the windows,
shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could
continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.

4.... Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would
cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you
would have to reinstall the engine.

5..... Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was
reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive - but would run
on only five percent of the roads.

6..... The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would
all be replaced by a single "This Car Has Performed An Illegal
Operation" warning light.

I love the next one!

7....... The airbag system would ask, "Are you sure?"before deploying.

8........ Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock
you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the
door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.

9......... Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to
learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would
operate in the same manner as the old car.

10.......... You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine
off.

PS - I'd like to add that when all else fails, you could call "customer
service" in some foreign country and be instructed in some foreign
language how to fix your car yourself!
__________________
Signature
Here's to you and here's to me, and I hope we never disagree. But, if that should ever be, to HELL with you, here's to ME!
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 12-04-2013, 08:22 PM
vittok's Avatar
vittok vittok is offline
Tripletail
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: New Iberia, LA
Posts: 566
Cash: 1,322
Default

Good one!!
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 03:02 PM.



Powered by vBulletin®
Copyright ©2000 - [ARG:3 UNDEFINED], Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vB.Sponsors
vBCredits v1.4 Copyright ©2007 - 2008, PixelFX Studios
SaltyCajun.com logo provided by Bryce Risher

All content, images, designs, and logos are Copyright © 2009-2012,
Salty Cajun, LLC
No unathorized use is permitted
Geo Visitors Map