SaltyCajun.com http://www.boltonford.com//

Notices

Go Back   SaltyCajun.com > General Discussion Forums > The Comedy Club (Jokes, Humor)

The Comedy Club (Jokes, Humor) Tell your favorite jokes here! Keep it PG rated, please.

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 11-09-2009, 09:01 PM
bay_slayer's Avatar
bay_slayer bay_slayer is offline
King Mackeral
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Morgan City
Posts: 2,560
Cash: 843
Default Yo Mama So Ugly

Yo mama's so ugly, her shadow quit.

Yo mama's so ugly, when she looks in the mirror, the reflection ducks.

Yo mama's so ugly, her birth certificate was an apology letter from the condom factory.

Yo mama's so ugly, she looks like she's been in a dryer filled with rocks.

Yo mama's so ugly, she looks like her face caught on fire and they put it out with a fork.

Yo mama's so ugly, they rub tree branches on her face to make ugly sticks.

Yo mama's so ugly, even the tide won't take her out.

Yo mama's so ugly, when she cries, tears run down the back of her neck.

Yo mama's so ugly, she has to creep up on her makeup.

Yo mama was such an ugly baby, her parents had to feed her with a slingshot.
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 11-10-2009, 04:47 PM
CatDaddy's Avatar
CatDaddy CatDaddy is offline
King Mackeral
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Gueydan
Posts: 2,594
Cash: 643
Default

Now thats some funny **** there...
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 11-10-2009, 05:00 PM
huntin fool's Avatar
huntin fool huntin fool is offline
Great White
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Louisiana
Posts: 11,203
Cash: 1,902
Default

yo momma is so black she goes butt naked to funerals

yo momma is so stupid the door bell rang she checked the microwave

YO MOMMA IS SO OLD ----

she left her purse on Noah's Ark.

Jurassic Park brought back the memories...

when she ran the 100 metre dash, they timed her with a sundial.

she still owes Moses a dollar.

when she was at school...there was No history class!

she co-wrote the 4th Commandment.

when I asked for her ID she handed me a rock

she recalls when the Grand Canyon was a ditch.

the fire department are on standby when you light her birthday cake

when she gave birth, You came out with Dentures.

she sat in front of Jesus in 1st grade

her birthday expired.

when Moses parted the Red Sea, he found yo momma fishing on the other side!

she got the first copy of the Ten Commandments.

YO MOMMA IS SO FAT



when she step on the Weight Scales it says...'to be continued'...

she once went on a seafood diet...whenever she saw food she ate it!

folk exercise by jogging around her!

when she bends over, we enter Daylight Saving Time.

she sat on a Nintendo Gamecube and it turned into a gameboy

NASA plan to use her to shore up the hole in the Ozone layer

she was measured at 38-26-36 and that was just the left arm...

small objects orbit her.

she make olympic sumo wrestlers look anerixic.

when she farted she launched herself into orbit.

she lost a game at Hide&Seek only cos I spotted her...behind Mount Everest.

when I had to swerve to avoid hitting her on the road I ran out of gas in my car!

she could be the eighth continent.


her graduation photo was an aerial

when she auditioned for a part in Raiders of the Lost Ark she got the part of the big Rolling Ball.

her fave food is seconds.

her belt size is Equator.

she eats Desert out of a Trash Can lid

she wears an 'X' jacket and HeliCopters attempt to land on her

she shows up on radar.

she needs a map to find her butt.

she fell into the Grand Canyon....and got stuck!

she wears an asteroid belt.

she was in the Daily Record last week on page 5, 6, 7, 8, and 9.

the circus use her as a trampoline

stunt agencies use her as an air mattress

when she opens the Fridge it says - 'I give up...'

she got a new gig at the Cinema...she works as the screen

she once told me 'I could eat a horse'...believe me, she wasn't kidding!








Sorry it took so long to type this..but I can do this all day. I'm the king at this
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 11-10-2009, 05:02 PM
Jordan's Avatar
Jordan Jordan is offline
Great White
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: DeRidder,LA
Posts: 10,399
Cash: 2,534
Default

lmao..... this is great thread 5 stars !!!
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 11-10-2009, 05:05 PM
huntin fool's Avatar
huntin fool huntin fool is offline
Great White
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Louisiana
Posts: 11,203
Cash: 1,902
Default

added more...im done for today..my hand hurts
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 11-10-2009, 06:34 PM
bay_slayer's Avatar
bay_slayer bay_slayer is offline
King Mackeral
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Morgan City
Posts: 2,560
Cash: 843
Default

i post some more in a lil bit
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 11-10-2009, 08:49 PM
fishinpox's Avatar
fishinpox fishinpox is offline
Blue Marlin
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: baton rouge
Posts: 8,470
Cash: 5,316
Default

Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old 03-11-2013, 02:35 PM
Captain Mike P.'s Avatar
Captain Mike P. Captain Mike P. is offline
Redfish
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Houma
Posts: 149
Cash: 846
Default

Yo mamma's teeth so big when she sneeze she stabs herself in the chest.
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old 03-11-2013, 05:18 PM
Ragin_Cajun's Avatar
Ragin_Cajun Ragin_Cajun is offline
Tripletail
 
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Lafayette
Posts: 920
Cash: 1,571
Default

So old, she farts dust!

so fat, she sits on a mo ped and you can hear the engine.

So fat, when she goes to the movies, she takes up two seats and doesn't feel the arm rest inbetween.
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Old 03-11-2013, 07:03 PM
mriguy's Avatar
mriguy mriguy is offline
Sailfish
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Barber Spur, LA
Posts: 5,007
Cash: 5,200
Default

So ugly, her parents had to tie a porkchop around her neck so the dogs would play with her.
Reply With Quote
  #11  
Old 03-11-2013, 07:05 PM
mriguy's Avatar
mriguy mriguy is offline
Sailfish
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Barber Spur, LA
Posts: 5,007
Cash: 5,200
Default

So fat that one time she was on my mind, and she broke my neck
Reply With Quote
  #12  
Old 03-11-2013, 10:12 PM
Gasper Master's Avatar
Gasper Master Gasper Master is offline
Tripletail
 
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Opelousas
Posts: 666
Cash: 1,752
Default

So dumb, she put a ruler beside her bed to see how long she could sleep

Armpits are so hairy, it looks like she got Buckwheat in a head lock
Reply With Quote
  #13  
Old 03-11-2013, 10:12 PM
Gasper Master's Avatar
Gasper Master Gasper Master is offline
Tripletail
 
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Opelousas
Posts: 666
Cash: 1,752
Default

So dumb, she put a ruler beside her bed to see how long she could sleep

Armpits are so hairy, it looks like she got Buckwheat in a head lock
Reply With Quote
  #14  
Old 03-12-2013, 07:02 AM
Duffy.yyz's Avatar
Duffy.yyz Duffy.yyz is offline
Tripletail
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Lake Charles
Posts: 797
Cash: 2,577
Default

Yo momma so dumb, she went to a movie "Under 17 Not Admitted"....She brought 16 of her friends.
Reply With Quote
  #15  
Old 03-12-2013, 10:23 AM
Reggoh's Avatar
Reggoh Reggoh is offline
Tripletail
 
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Iowa, LA
Posts: 724
Cash: 1,454
Default

Yo mama is so fat her picture falls off the wall

Yo mama is so fat when she "sits around the house"... she sits AROUND The House!
Reply With Quote
  #16  
Old 12-04-2013, 10:24 PM
vittok's Avatar
vittok vittok is offline
Tripletail
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: New Iberia, LA
Posts: 566
Cash: 1,322
Default

Lol
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 05:48 PM.



Powered by vBulletin®
Copyright ©2000 - [ARG:3 UNDEFINED], Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vB.Sponsors
vBCredits v1.4 Copyright ©2007 - 2008, PixelFX Studios
SaltyCajun.com logo provided by Bryce Risher

All content, images, designs, and logos are Copyright © 2009-2012,
Salty Cajun, LLC
No unathorized use is permitted
Geo Visitors Map