Stupid things you've told your wife

[Finfeatherfur]

Not really the same thing, but close!

My sis-in-law is really coming out of her shell following her divorce. At a Sunday lunch not long ago, I stopped by to eat while on duty. My wife, her mom, and the 78 y/o grandmaw were in the kitchen. My sis-n-law makes the comment "did you taze anyone today". Well, not thinking, I pulled my Tazer, removed the dart pack, and gave her a glancing blow on the hip that lasted all of about 0.5 seconds. The point of impact was right above her back pocket and w/o warning - the loudest "F" bomb ever spoken in my mother n law's house was let out in front of everyone!!! Even the kids were like "Holy crap"!!!!

To make it worse, a few minutes later she dropped her pants in front of everyone to show us the marks from the Tazer. Apparently, when the drive stun made contact, a rivet from her jean was in the middle of the pattern. To this day, her grandmother and mom both look at me with evil eyes when I walk in the door in uniform.